The old grandfather clock strikes midnight. Outside my window, the world is silent. Apart from a stray’s stray bark once in a while, not a soul stirs. My ears strain to hear the hoot of the owl from its perch on the mango tree, or the honk of a car as it speeds past my gate. From the next room, the gentle snores of my father echo through the house. I envy him, envy my neighbours who sleep soundly, unaware of the silence.
My room is dark, but for the soft glow of my laptop screen. A blank document stares back at me. It has been so since a few days. I wonder if it mocks me, goading me to empty thought after thought onto it with the tap-tap-tap of the keys. I want to. I’m desperate to, but yet I don’t want to. I cannot. They’ve been pushed into the depths by voices that whisper they are worthless. Only I know how much they mean, and yet there seems to be a need for acceptance. I don’t know when that came, how that came, why I’m unable to shake it off.
Every night, the battle continues. Words against emptiness. The noise inside my head, the silence outside my window. No witnesses.
No one …
… except me.
I’m taking part in the #WordsMatter blog hop. I’m happy to be participating, along with Nikita Dudani, Anami and 44 others. Please do check out these two wonderful bloggers and their posts as well! You can follow #WordsMatter on social media to find more interpretations on the theme “Outside My Window”.