Written as part of Friday Fictioneers, which offers the image as inspiration to write a fiction in 100 words (or less).
Drawing hearts
He would draw a heart on the window when it frosted over in winter. Write my name inside. Watch me smile. I needed nothing else to feel warm, to feel loved.
Then the other job offer came. It was what he had dreamed of. He had to go away. He said he’d be back.
Then the other woman came. He texted me it was over.
Today, the window has frosted over again. A fire roars in the grate. Yet I shiver.
Perhaps he still draws hearts. The name and the window have changed; and the smile.
(© Vinay Leo R. @ I Rhyme Without Reason, 1st July 2016)
Vinay Leo R.
Poetry & writing are to me, a breath of fresh air in a life that is sometimes covered by the smoke of sorrow or self doubt. They also become the sweets I share to celebrate when life offers me a reason to. But most of all, they are to me, my life. For each word I write is a piece of my heart, a thought that just had to find its way into the world.
Niice !
(Nimue recently posted…Nightmares)
Thank you, Nimue.
So much changes with time, it’s scary. Nice one. 🙂
(Dashy recently posted…To Magic, with love)
Yes. And it doesn’t change the way we want it to, sadly. Thank you, Dashy.
Heartwrenching end!
Yes. Sometimes, it is so. Thanks, Sam.
Thats quite a story in 100 words. Loved it.
Thank you, Lata.
Sadly such is life, for many. You told it so well, I like. Mike
Thank you, Mike.
Excellent “feeling” in this piece. The characters feel alive and are so possible. Well done!
Glad you felt that the characters and the piece had the feelings come alive 😀 Thank you, Angela.
This is what usually happens. You have captured it well.
(Sherry Blue sky recently posted…POETS ARE SKY ANIMALS)
Thank you, Sherry. 🙂
Sad tale.
You have a typo in the 5th line. He told (me) he’d be back
Sorry but it was bugging me.
Tracey
(Tracey@WhatsforDinnerDoc.com recently posted…The Passion of Flamenco, It Holds You Fast)
Glad you liked the tale, Tracey. 🙂 I feel the “me” is understood, since there’s no other characters involved but the narrator herself.
Actually, Vinay, in English the me is not implied. It just stand out as a typos.
Sorry. Aside from that it is a bittersweet tale.
Shalom,
Rochelle
OK. When there is only two characters, I thought the “me” is implied. 🙂 Thank you, Rochelle.
To add to that. If it’s a word count issue, to say “he said he’d be back”. In English told and said are not used quite the same way.
Ah. Yeah. I think that that makes more sense, to use “said”. 🙂 Thank you, Rochelle.
Sad changes…but life happens, doesn’t it?
(Sanch @ Sanch Writes recently posted…Cold-hearted)
It does. And it goes on after a while. Thank you, Sanch.
How tragic – first that he left her and second that she lets his memory stop her from finding a new man to draw hearts on her window.
Yes. Sometimes, it takes time to let go completely, perhaps. Thank you, Liz.
S o bittersweet… when the heart is drawn with other names…
I agree. It’s more bitter than sweet though. Thank you, Bjorn.
Very sad. It would seem his love lasted little longer than the frost on the window. He’ll probably be the same with the present woman. He’s a selfish person and I hope she heals and carries on with her life. Good story, Vinay, and well written. —- Suzanne
I hope so too, Patricia. Thank you. Glad you felt it was well written.
It’s so understandable why we would want people we love to stay. The moment we let them go to seek their dreams, we don’t know what we are signing up for. Like the other woman. Scary!
(Sreedeep recently posted…Anand – a happy patient)
Yeah. There would be other unforeseen things, I suppose. Can’t be predicted, Sreedeep.